Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader is sure that many of you out there were waiting for those words to be written. Well there they are. Your Maximum Leader is back at the Villainschloss and all is right in the world.

Well… Everything except this blog… It seems as though even though they were warned that your Maximum Leader wouldn’t be around, the other bloggers here decided to pass up the opportunity to write One Word Film Reviews, Gun Posts, or lengthy treatises on agriculture. It is sad really. Given the keys to the Kingdom and what happens? Nuthin. This, dear minions, is the reason that it is the Mike World Order and your Maximum Leader will be in charge. If given the choice between establishing a world order or sittin’ around doin’ nuthin’ they would choose… Nuthin’.

So, where to begin…

Your Maximum Leader had a great time away for the most part. He’ll not bore you all with the cumbersome details, but allow him to give his completely unlimited endorsement of the Nemacolin Woodlands Resort and Spa. What a great place. Your Maximum Leader partook of world-class dining, private exercise classes, luxury accomodations, and - most of all - shooting.

Yes… Shooting. Your Maximum Leader spent an afternoon at the (world famous) Nemacolin Shooting Academy. He went out and shot at sporting clays with a brand new Browning Citori 525 Golden Clays model. He shot at 100 targets at about 20 different stations. (He only hit about 30 - in case you were wondering.) It had been about 10 years since your Maximum Leader had gone shooting with a shotgun. (And the last time was a charity trap shoot in fact…) It was a treat for him. His accuracy improved as the afternoon progressed (as one would hope it would). Although he made improvements, your Maximum Leader was greatly distressed at his inability to “pick up” many of the clay pigeons. He found those pigeons that came out of a thicket, at a distance, and didn’t break towards him were the hardest to see. It was somewhat distressing. He thinks a combination of age, lack of practice, and the size of his glasses were all contributing factors. Probably practice and size of glasses being the largest.

By the way… If any particularly generous minion out there has lots of cash and wants to get on your Maximum Leader’s good side… Someone could go and buy him a shotgun.

Your Maximum Leader will to return to Nemacolin (with Mrs. Villain this time) this spring. On a second visit he may partake of more shooting clays and the Hummer Driving school. Also when he returns he will go to Aqueous. Aqueous was highly recommended; but your Maximum Leader just didn’t have the time.

He did partake of Lautrec’s however; where he got a tasting menu. He had the: Bay Scallops w/caviar (a little too salty), the Lobster soup (quite good, mild and captured without overpowering, the taste of lobster), Squab w/Foie Gras (normally not a big squab fan, but this dish was very enjoyable - probably more a case of the main ingredient being improved by the supporting cast), and the Duet of Beef (which was excellent). He finished off with a special chocolate raspberry creme brulee (which was good - but a little too chocolate-y for your Maximum Leader).

In addition to Lautrec’s he also ate at the Golden Trout and 30 East Main. Both of which were excellent, but with a more conventional menu. Indeed the “comfort food” on the menu at 30 East Main was great. (Your Maximum Leader had suffed cabbage. Quite yummy.)

So… Let it no suffice to say that he enjoyed himself very much… But for as much as he enjoyed himself, it didn’t beat returning to the Villainschloss and the arms of his awaiting wife and children.

Carry on.