Looking Forward To Easter

The Maximum Leader is looking forward to Easter.

He and his lovely family will join the Smallholders at our little farm. Mike, my neighbor Paul, and I will retire to the kitchen and spend the day cooking a home-raised leg of lamb and a home-raised ham. While drinking beer and scotch.

And it gets better.

I know the Maximum Leader will soon be gleefully atwitter.

Paul and I were discussing how Scottish cuisine developed as a dare: “I bet you won’t eat that!”

Paul jumps up and finds his recipe for haggis, lamenting that he has never had the chance to make it. Stomachs are hard to come by in the United States.

A lightbulb goes on over my head. “I’m taking a lamb in to the butcher right before our Easter meal! I’ll have the butcher save the stomach!”

Paul then declares: “I’ll bring my bagpipe CD and pipe the haggis into the dining room! We’ll toast the haggis with Scotch!”

I suspect that the Maximum Leader is, at this very moment, running to see if his kilt still fits.

Easter is gonna rock!


Of course my kilt fits!

And I am becoming more and more gleeful in antcipation.

Nugget said:

Now seeing as this would be a rare occassion, you may wish to celebrate it in traditional Burns Night style, starting with the Selkirk Grace before the Haggis is piped in.

After that, the Haggis needs to be addressed properly. You then applaud and toast the Haggis (I recommend a nice 18yr old Speyside for this) before cutting the beastie open.

After eating the Haggis (with bashit neeps and champit tatties I hope), you have the Immortal Memory, followed by the Toast to the Lassies. And if you have lassies present, they need to provide The Response.

And finally, you finish the nght with laughter, songs and poetry and general partaking of whisky.

A Haggis is a more than a meal, it’s an event in itself. Although half of us Scots hate the damn stuff and use it as an excuse to drink copious amounts!

Brian B said:

I now officially hate you all.


For the most part, I’m impressed by your knowledge and appreciative of the information, but you lost me on one point: Speysides are for wimps. Give me an Islay any day.


Where can one acquire the proper forms and chants?


As a loyal minion, you are deserving of a farm feast in your honor should you ever travel to our fair commonwealth. We will, as they say, kill the fatted calf.

Brian B said:

Woo Hoo! I’ll remember those words… ;-)

Ally said:

I just want pictures of ML in his kilt. That is all I ask.

Nugget said:


On the whole I’d agree and, personally, I favour Bowmore’s (the Dusk is exceptional, as is the 21yr old) or head north and try Isle of Jura’s 16yr old (a great distillery to visit as well).

For a Speyside malt, I’d recommend trying the Balmenach Old Malt Cask (although finding a bottle can be difficult) or the Banff Chieftains Choice (again, finding a bottle is tricky and expensive, but worth it).

And once I find a decent guide to proper Haggis etiquette I shall forward it on..

Don’t fret Smallholder. Your Maximum Leader has all of the appropriate graces, poems, and responses at the Villainschloss.

I also have a bottle of Craigganmore that I can bring along. I may, if you are really good, bring a bottle of 30 year old Macallan.

I am fond of Bowmore myself, as I am of all Islays. But I fear I burned myself out on them a few years back and have been sticking to the various Highland scotches for the past few years.

Although it sounds sorta pedestrian, I’ve grown very very fond of the Glenfiddich 15 year Solana reserve.

And Ally… A photo of me in a kilt can be exchanged for a photo of you in a bathing suit.

Brian B said:

These days I’m lucky to affor a dram, let alone a BOTTLE, of the stuff I favor. My favorite is Ardbeg, though Laphroaig is a close second (I’d DIE to get a taste of the new Small Cask bottling).

MoK said:

Ah, and to make the event complete, you must have “Hollerin’ for Haggis” emanating from the speakers ;-) http://www.therogues.com/sound/MIT-Hollerin.mp3
(Or anything by The Rogues, for that matter.)
A most maximus “Dangit!”– we envy the Villians (”esp. if ya throw in a bottle of Glenmorangie 18 yr.old”–The ‘Mate :)

sadie said:

I wanna go.

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