Landlord Quiz

You have three people who want to rent your house. You talk to them on the phone and they fill out a rental application.

To which person do you rent your house?

a) Family of four. Father is retired military. Makes north of 90 grand a year working for a defense contractor. Has a security clearance, one of the conditions of which is the requirement to pay rent on time.

b) Young guy with pregnant wife. When he asks about the rent, you tell him it is $1600/month and that you want the equivalent of a month’s rent as a deposit, as well as the first month’s rent in advance. He says, “So that’s what, $3400? He fills out the application and makes $11/hour at McDonalds.

c) Fifyish couple moving to the area for new jobs in academia. They have sold their house and want to live in the area for a year before they buy. They had paid off their mortgage on the house and aren’t used to making monthly payments, so ask if it is okay to go ahead and write a check for the whole year’s rent in advance.

Who do you rent to? Explain your answer.

10 Comments
Bill said:

depends on who I am:

Young, soft-hearted woman wanting to help every one–rent to couple b)

Liberal looking to make money on the side–rent to couple c)

Me: rent to the retired military–he will pay on time, he will take care of the property. He has kept me safe during the years he served. The professor and wife will pay once, then consider everything that goes wrong my responsibility and will always being demanding something more. The young couple will have to be evicted within a few months because they can’t do the arithmetic to balance their checkbook and every rent check will bounce.



phin said:

I’d probably go with retired military. Same reasons Bill lists, plus he may have a hot college aged daughter who frolics about the property scantily clad.

Or you could go with option d) the stripper with lots of hot friends that thinks I’m cute.



Brian B said:

I’d want more information before I’d answer:

For how long do I intend to rent out the house? My in-laws spent 3 years overseas, and rented their house out for that specific time.

Why am I renting it out? Is this my main source of income, a major source of income, or (like my current landlord), a hobby investment?

How much would I get if I sold it instead?

How big is the house? How many bedrooms? Bathrooms?

Sorry, not enough info to go on.



Brian:

House to be rented for forseeable future. Perhaps indefinitely, as once the mortgage is paid off, the rent checks can pay for college. Alternatively, sale of the home, even after capital gains, should cover tuiton.

It is not yet a real source of inome; rent is only $100 more than mortgage and costs.

The landlord is renting out a house in a shameless ploy to exploit assinine capital gains taxation law. Landlord would rather not be a landlord, and thinks capital gains should be taxed like other sources of income, but feels obligated to his family to take advantage of the existing pro-wealth system of shielding capital gains through roll-over 1031 exchanges.

Sales are slow in the area, but value is in the range of $400,000.

2400 square feet, 4/5 bedrooms, 3 baths, half acre of land.

Phin:
No friendly strippers or college coeds on the horizon.



Brian:

House to be rented for forseeable future. Perhaps indefinitely, as once the mortgage is paid off, the rent checks can pay for college. Alternatively, sale of the home, even after capital gains, should cover tuition.

It is not yet a real source of inome; rent is only $100 more than mortgage and costs.

The landlord is renting out a house in a shameless ploy to exploit assinine capital gains taxation law. Landlord would rather not be a landlord, and thinks capital gains should be taxed like other sources of income, but feels obligated to his family to take advantage of the existing pro-wealth system of shielding capital gains through roll-over 1031 exchanges.

Sales are slow in the area, but value is in the range of $400,000.

2400 square feet, 4/5 bedrooms, 3 baths, half acre of land.

Phin:
No friendly strippers or college coeds on the horizon.



Of course, this is all hypothetical.



I think I heard the guy in item (B) saying:

Dark and lonely on a summer’s night.
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Watchdog barking. Do he bite?
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Slip in his window. Break his neck.
Then his house I start to wreck.
Got no reason. What the heck?
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
C-I-L my landlord!



Brian B said:

Not knowing much about Real Estate and Tax laws, I can’t say, but I suspect that such a landlord would choose the renters who optimize his efforts to exploit capital gains laws.



Darn exploitive landlords!



Exploitive Landlords? Did someone call?



    About Naked Villainy

    • maxldr

    Villainous
    Contacts

    • E-mail your villainous leader:
      "maxldr-blog"-at-yahoo-dot-com or
      "maximumleader"-at-nakedvillainy-dot-com

    • Follow us on Twitter:
      at-maximumleader

    • No really follow on
      Twitter. I tweet a lot.

Naked Villainy… Enema of the State.

    Villainous Commerce

    Villainous Sponsors

      • Get your link here.

      Villainous Search