Blogger Haiku For No Particular Reason

Dead sexy? What’s that?
Smallholder prefers women
With a bloody pulse

Semen sabatoeur
Spiteful Sadie seeks solace
Siccing Smallholder

Kudos to Ally
JP in green stilettos
Drool on my keyboard

Who moved my truth?
Abortion debate hangs me
Out to dry. Of course.

MoP in funk
Ally refrains from posting
Skanky crack whore pics

Maximum Leader
AWOL yet again
While the cat’s away…

Ho cruxifiction?
Photoshoped Golgotha
Cheeky Blasphemer!

Commenting William
Blaming pernicious teachers
Smallholder is hurt

Commenting William
Scores highly for heresy
Jehovah’s Witness

What are you, William?
An effeminite pansy?
Unicorn blog post!

Smallholder uses
Religious hyperbole
Memento objects

Disclaimer? No need
Brian will set the record straight
Mark is heretic.

9 Comments
Bill said:

As it turns out, if you will do your research in Legend of the Drow, a Unicorn is NOT a sissy animal. In fact can be quite intimidating. The stallions have a beard. So imagine a Clydesdale with a broadened forehead and a well-proportioned three-plus feet long horn as a weapon. You might consider a Magnum in some large caliber an equalizer, but remember they also have magical powers.

Mark speaks too soon.
Unicorn crack
leaves horn in bad place.



Whatever you say, Nancy boy.



YOU are such an amusing fellow.



Bill said:

He’s jealous, he can’t raise them.



Arielle said:

::dying of laughter in cubicle:: I’ve always asked for sonnets to be written for me. (Hasn’t happened yet - helps if I don’t date jocks, I guess) But Haiku? Be still my beating heart!

Now if I can just reach “minion” status….



Ally,

Would that sonnet you’ve always wanted be Shakespearean or Petrarchian? Just askin’

I once wrote a sonnet for a girl…

Once…



Brian B said:

Every girl wants a sonnet — until she gets one. Then she decides it’s just dorky. Or creepy. Or both.



Ally said:

I’m not picky. It could be a jingle set to a Chicago tune - if he said he wrote it for me, I’d be swooning!

Creepy if you write more than one. One is okay.



There is a certain confluence of dorkyness and creepyness concerning sonnet writing in our time.

That confluence would be made even more dorky and creepy (if that is possible) if I were to write a true (romantic) sonnet for Ally.

How about a limerick?



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