Fish them to extinction

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader, while not considering himself an environmentalist exactly, does believe in sensible stewardship of our natural resources. Normally he wouldn’t find himself encouraging something as villainous as fishing a particular species to extinction. But these are extreme times my friends.

Apparently the lionfish is destroying reefs and fish populations all the way from Florida to Maine. The lionfish is not native to our Atlantic coast. Now environmentalists, chefs and foodies are going to try and do their part to eradicate the lionfish. According to the Washington Post there is a full-fledged movement afoot to get people to eat the little buggers and remove them from our coasts.

Apparently the major hurdle to widespread ingestion of the lionfish is availability. This is to say availability for purchase. The little buggers are out in the water if you want them, it takes some work to catch them. Did your Maximum Leader say catch them. He is wrong, they need to be speared. Spearfishing is the only way to get the lionfish to market.

Here is a solution to this problem. Take many of the unemployed Americans out there and give them some snorkeling lessons and a spear and see how many lionfish they can take in a day. If people were paid by the fish you could likely put a serious dent in the lionfish population in no time. (How many unemployed former autoworkers from Michigan would enjoy relocating for a summer to the warm and sunny south and get to spend some time snorkling and killing lionfish? It is like a fishing vacation that you get paid for…)

Your Maximum Leader will look around for places where he can get lionfish. He’s all for eating a species to extinction…

This species at least…

Carry on.

George Pal said:

Former autoworkers from Michigan and Illinois will be unavailable to deal with your lionfish problem as they will be busy with the regional Asian carp infestation. The carp, having made it to Lake Calumet have made Lake Michigan their destination.

Not to make a correlative association to illegal immigration but… ooops… just did.

Anyways, care for Asian carp?

I’m all for exterminating non-native species. Especially the tasty ones. I don’t know if asian carp are tasty. But if they are I’m more for it.

So does Governor Grantholm have a plan to retrain any of those former auto workers to fish asian carp?

Kevin Kim said:

Sorry I missed your call! I’m in and out of the house today, buying bookshelves and gearing up for the next big phase of the ongoing home project. Now it’s time to clear out the laundry room, where most of my books are being stored.

As for catching the evil fish: this guy might be your man.


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