Decline and fall of Western Civilization, Pt CLXIV

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader wonders what has become of the Washington Post? The newspaper that brought you Watergate now feels the need to bring you 4 full (web-based - not print) pages explaining “Wingmen.”

As if you need to explain the concept of the Wingman? Great jeezey chreezey! Your Maximum Leader particularly liked the duty listing of the Wingman:

He must be decent-looking but not too handsome, or the lead man will end up being the wingman. He must be sociable, able to move the conversation forward or back off, depending on how the lead is doing. It helps if he can gather intelligence on the girl early in the evening, sense whether his buddy has a chance and impart that wisdom privately before the offensive starts.

Your Maximum Leader particularly liked the following line that explained that if the friends of the “target” are not that attractive then the Wingman must “throw himself on the grenade.”

Heh. Throw himself on the grenade. What an analogy. As if chatting up an unattractive girl is like saving your buddies in a foxhole…

Your Maximum Leader flew Wingman once or twice for the Smallholder. (In the days before Mrs. Smallholder of course.) The Smallholder did the same for your Maximum Leader. It is the way of men…

Of course, none of this explains why the Washington Post feels the need to make Wingmen news. It isn’t like the Wingman is a new deal. Famous Wingmen of the arts might include Petruchio and Tranio, Figaro, among others. Perhaps the article isn’t exactly a sign of the decline and impending fall of Western Civilization… Perhaps it is just a slow news day… Or not…

Carry on.

1 Comment

I have no recollection of you flying wingman for me… I do remember flying wingman for you several times. I humbly suggest a post for our loyal minions about the descendent of Alexander H.H. Stevens. I also recall flying wingman at my own 21st birthday party, resulting in being ditched for a certain brunette (Tina?).

In fact, I think that, more often then not, I fell into the roll of wingman for you, the Foreign Minister, and the Minister of Propaganda. Always unsuccesfully for the Foreign Minister, but if I had a dime for every successful mission for the MoP I’d own way more land. (And has he intoduced me to the lovely Miss Pressly? Ingrate!)



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